Recently, I read this above mentioned sentence in a paper of the anthropologist Christian Groes-Green. There, he describes that white men who date Mosambican women say, that they don’t want to go back to date White women because the Mosambican women were way better in bed then the Whites.
“Compared to white women, they claimed, Mozambican women or African women in general have a sexual aura and skills in bed that make white men go crazy. Time and again they reiterated the common saying “Once you go black you never go back” to explain why they could never again have sex with a European woman” (Groes-Green 2013: 112).
This just reminds me of the many conversations I had with Batswana men who actually said the opposite. They say, that the Botswana or African women were too boring and that they don’t want to try out new things in bed. So, in the Batswana case, it sems like the sexual aura and skills do not exist at all. The routine, so they say, is missionary style and not much more. The men say, they wished to have a European woman because she would do those crazy things in bed like giving a blowjob or so.
Now, I wonder what’s going on! Who’s right and who’s wrong?
Sure, sure, sure: Botswana is not Mozambique.
And obviously, there cannot be a right or wrong because who could say that African or European women are per se better or worse lovers in bed?
What’s interesting here is where the generalization about African or European women is coming from?
Is that all real experience?
And which role do media images play?
From my perspective, the sentence “once you go black you never go back” seems rather to be a romantic picture of the exotic „Other” than a once for all truth.
Source: Groes-Green, Christian (2013). “To put men in a bottle”: Eroticism, kinship, female power, and transactional sex in Maputo, Mozambique. American Ethnologist 40(1): 102-117.